Who needs it?

If misery loves company I sure would enjoy some.  I guess I'm not really miserable  but the possibility of it is pretty close.  I realized last night that I only have three or four people that I talk with daily.  Weird, isn't it?  I spend my day with a baby that can't talk and a daughter that can't talk.  Who designed this life?  I guess part of it was me.  I love having Ella.  Couldn't imagine not seeing the little bug almost everyday.  Betsy?  Well that's another story which I'm sure you all know.  I'm not asking for help or suggestions on what I can do to make things different.  I have excuses for everything you could throw at me and I won't appreciate them at all. So shhh.   What works in your life won't work in mine.   You don't live mine.  You don't know mine as much as you think you do.  The only person that can fix it is me and I'll be damned if I can come up with anything.  My day is brightened up by Stephanie's lunch time visits, my talks with Cara, and when Robert pulls in the driveway I feel like a weight is lifted off my shoulders.  Cara talked me into blogging again.  I said my blogs would all be about negativity. I was worried about what other people might think.  You know, the thousands that will read it.  I guess if you don't want to read it you don't have to.  I'm actually hoping it will help me to get some of this that is traveling around in my mind OUT of my mind.  It's a swirling mess!  Hopefully, putting this on paperette some of the misery will find another place to go.  Crossing fingers and wanting it to go far away from me.